I’ve been fighting groundhogs under my workshop for a couple years. Started innocuously. One seemingly harmless groundhog and a hole going under the workshop. The groundhog didn’t even create the hole. A raccoon was living under there first. I harassed the racoon away because of how destructive they can be. They don’t just eat the birdseed, they tear apart the feeders to get to the seed.
Sometime after the racoon left, the groundhog moved in. Didn’t really bother me too much. It ate the birdseed on the ground but didn’t seem to harm anything. Except maybe the tomatoes. Not sure if the groundhog was responsible for eating all of them. There were other potential culprits hanging around like rabbits and opossums, but the groundhog was a prime suspect.
Then came the babies. Cute little critters but they unfortunately become big critters. The next thing I know there are several tunnels going under the workshop. Most of last summer I battled them. I would pour ammonia or other vile liquids down the holes, then fill the holes, and pour more nasty liquids on top of the fill. I always left the main entrance open so they could leave. I didn’t want to trap anyone under the shop.
A couple times I thought I was successful. They appeared to have moved into my neighbor’s woods behind us. I would go a couple weeks without seeing them run under the workshop. Then the entrances would appear again and it was back to business as usual. Finally, towards the end of last summer it appears that the young ones left to find their fortunes. Then I lost sight of the big one. Once again I filled all the entrances except the main one. Just in case something was still living under there.
This Spring I thought I was free of them. We went way into the warm weather before I saw the fat one arise from under the workshop. Followed a few days later by three young ones. So it was back to the same ol’ trench warfare routine. I fill the holes, they dig them out. Then they escalated the war. They dug a new tunnel entrance under our deck.
I really am a live and let live kind of guy. I don’t care that they eat the birdseed on the ground. They don’t climb up into the feeders like the squirrels or knock the feeders down like the raccoons. But they keep digging and expanding. They’re as bad as real estate developers. I don’t want to kill them, I just want them to stop living under my shop.
Desperate times demand desperate responses. I could try piping Barry Manilow music into their tunnels or I could go chemical. I went chemical because I thought it was more humane. I bought a bottle of genuine coyote urine. And some rubber gloves to handle the stuff. It smells really, really bad. Like walking through the New York City subway system kind of bad. I don’t even want to think about how they got the stuff either. Maybe kennel some coyotes and give them all the Budweiser they want? But apparently it’s the real thing, not some chemical substitute. Just to let the record show, I did try using my own urine last summer. The groundhogs ignored it. You get what you pay or I guess. Hopefully the coyote piss is more effective than mine was.
This has got to be one of the weirder occupations I can think of. “What do you do for a living”? I pump coyotes dry “. Do they store this stuff in tanks?
I haven’t just been battling groundhogs and chasing squirrels off bird feeders since we got back from Arizona. I’ve been putting the skills I learned during my week at the Marc Adams Woodworking School into practice. I’ve been using my lathe to make cylindrical objects from the ton of not cylindrical red oak I have laying around. I do mean a ton. At the rate I make these things I have enough red oak to last a lifetime. Unfortunately it’s one of the worst woods for learning woodturning. But, that’s what I got so that’s what I go with. Now I need to start finding homes for this stuff. Like getting rid of the extra zucchinis from your garden. You just start looking for unlocked cars.
Bowls, bud vases, and tea candle holders, looking for their forever homes.
Ed's and Lise's Biggish Years 