Tuesday, Dec. 23

 With due deference to Clement Moore or Major Henry Livingston.

‘Twas the night before Christmas, this year no blizzard,

Not a creature was stirring, especially not our lizard,

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

If you peek in them Molly, you’d better beware.

The family was nestled, all snug in their beds,

While visions of scrapple danced in their heads.

Lise in flannel, Molly back from the dorm,

Had all settled down, just like the norm.

I was just dropping off, then heard such a clatter,

Said a voice in my head “did any of it matter?

The year that’s past, it went by in a flash.

What did you do, and now where’s all the cash?”

I looked at the clock, its face all aglow.

The voice kept on saying, “I just have to know,”

When what to my wandering eyes should appear,

But a huge Visa bill, payment due, oh dear.

That nagging little voice, so lively and quick,

I needed a drink, Tullamore Dew, laid on thick.

More rapid than eagles, the expenses they came,

I whistled and shouted, they all caused me pain

Now passports, now visas, now taxis and rides.

On food, on tickets, on drivers and guides.

To remember each one, I just can’t quite recall,

now cash away, cash away, cash away all.

As dry leaves that before the hurricane fly,

The dollars they disappeared into the sky.

How can this be, is it just a bad dream?

I’m in trouble now, quick, Scottie the beam.

And then in a twinkling I thought the year through,

What was it, what was it, oh, what did I do?

Was it all worth it, what can I show?

Think, think, inquiring minds must know.

We did the Canal, what an engineering feat.

Round the world on water, now my goal I did meet.

The cruise was quite nice, though it came at a fee

But was worth every penny for the sights we did see.

The birds were all brilliant, red, green, and blue,

Monkeys and whales, little sea turtles too.

Walked on a lava field, still steaming and hot

We rode on a camel, sorry, Lawrence I‘m not.

“Sure, the cruise was great”, the voice was hissing,

But there has to be more, what are you missing?

In bits and snatches the memory grew,

It was Stefan and I, down to Peru we flew.

So much to do, we hit the ground running,

The cloud forest lush, Inca ruins were stunning.

We didn’t quite go native but we did try the food,

Llama and Guinea pig, lest we seem rude.

We did Machu Picchu, by the old Inca Trail.

Over Dead Woman’s Pass, not for the frail.

Small boat to the jungle, us and the freight.

After last winter, the heat was just great.

I sprang to my feet, with a shout and a holler

To the voice in my head, “it was worth every dollar”

We did the year good, we did the year right,

so happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night.